New To Therapy?
Many of our clients have come to therapy stating that they don’t have trauma because they weren’t in the military, or they weren’t sexually assaulted, or “mine isn’t as bad as…” Trauma is not about the event, but how the experience gets trapped in the brain and the body. Trauma is the result of an overwhelming event or experience that exceeds one’s ability to cope and to integrate the emotions, thoughts, and bodily sensations involved in that event…
Dissociation is best understood as stretching along a continuum of severity. On the left side of the continuum are things that we all do, like highway hypnosis, daydreaming, and a child’s imaginary play. In the middle are symptoms from Acute Stress Disorder and PTSD, such as flashbacks, detachment, depersonalization, and derealization. This happens when an individual dissociates or checks out from the traumatic experience, as it exceeds his or her ability to cope.
Methods
What to Expect in Therapy
Especially if this is your first time pursuing therapy or if you are looking for a reparative therapeutic experience, the therapeutic process can feel like uncharted waters. First, it’s about showing up and taking a step towards improving your mental health and wellness, and your relationships. It’s important to show up with an open mindset and a willingness for self-exploration. It is also vital to bring a sense of curiosity to sessions and to be curious about how and why you think and behave in the way you do.
Initially, I always recommend that clients commit to meeting on a weekly basis for at least two to three months. When we meet consistently, we can make more gains on an exponential level. As therapy progresses, many clients will go down to semi-monthly and then monthly sessions. It is important to openly discuss desired changes in frequency, then each client will make the final decision.
To get the most out of therapy, it’s best for a client to take what is discussed and learned in sessions and apply it to their daily life. Clients benefit greatly when they can practice their skills and use their growing knowledge on a day-to-day basis. Then clients can bring back those experiences to therapy, so we can explore what worked well and what needs improvement.
Some clients come to therapy hoping for a “golden nugget,” that changes everything. Unfortunately, this is not a realistic expectation. It takes a commitment of time and resources. And you are worth that commitment!
In the beginning, it can also be hard to imagine that a change in coping styles, perspectives, and relationships is possible, but let me share this analogy.
Imagine you are on a boat in the middle of the ocean and you decide to change course five degrees. For a while, when you look around, nothing has changed. All you can see in every direction is the ocean and sky. You may find yourself wanting to return to your familiar course because everything looks the same anyway and unknown waters can be uncertain. But if you stay the course, you will see land. And over the course of a thousand miles, that five-degree shift will bring you to a completely new destination.
Small shifts in your patterns of thinking, relating, and coping can open up new possibilities. And one day you will look back and recognize just how far you have come.